Confrontada Comigo Mesma | Aliança de Santa Maria

CONFRONTED
WITH MYSELF

As the day of Sr. Andreia's perpetual vows approaches next Sunday, we asked her:

- Andreia, how do you feel as the day of your perpetual vows approaches?

- If you had to explain to a child of 10 what perpetual vows are, what would you tell them?

I was born in Lisbon and, at the age of 19, I decided to say “Yes” to God's special call to follow him radically. In 2015 I took my first vows, publicly committing myself to the Lord in the Covenant of St. Mary, I passed through the community of Guimarães, and I am currently preparing to take perpetual vows.

Contrary to what you might think, being religious was never on my horizon as an ideal to follow, my family belonged to the “non-practicing Christian” class, but after Confirmation, attracted by the popularity and well-being of having many friends, I began to belong to the youth group and seek out all kinds of Christian meetings.

Timidly, an inner desire to grow in faith was growing in me. But at the same time, I was living in the banality that our culture offered me: a taste for parties, the “apparent freedom” that going out with friends gave, fashion, dancing, the possibility of dating, among other things. I was looking for something to give my life meaning, but I couldn't find it, so I filled my time with dates and outings.

After a strong experience of God in Taizé, I was rekindled in my desire to be an authentic Christian, without duplicity. From that moment on, I decided to concern myself with being more than “having things” or “doing things”.

“I was looking for something that would give meaning to my life..."

It was at a retreat organized by the sisters that I first heard the word vocation. From that moment on, I realized that I had to figure out what my vocation was. Confronted with myself and the incoherence I was experiencing, I was faced with an enormous emptiness and dissatisfaction caused by the life I was leading. I felt like everything was slipping out of my hands!

God's answer was clear to me. However, even though I saw this call clearly, such a radical lifestyle was unthinkable for me. I knew that only with God would my life gain meaning, but at the same time I didn't want to leave behind everything I had experienced so far, or the huge dream of being a mother.

But the joy of those sisters overcame my many fears and I slowly allowed myself to be seduced by Jesus. I asked for spiritual accompaniment and began to pray, and a world opened up that was unknown until then: a Face of Someone who knew me and loved me as I was, and touched my life very closely. This Face is that of Jesus, who met all the needs of my heart. And so the certainty that God has chosen me to follow him with an “undivided heart” is the greatest joy I have and the one that drives me to say YES to his call.

There is nothing to fear when what awaits us is God himself! A God of mercy, a God who only knows how to love and let himself be loved! It is to this God that I have given myself and it is of this God that I am happy to speak and share with you.

“I knew that only with God my life would win sense..."

Sister Andreia Ferreira